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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Under the stairs Bonus Points: 3.14159
    Posts
    3,958

    Stupid Hobbit Jokes

    Two Hobbits walk into a bar.
    One says to the other;
    Did ya hear the one about two hobbits walking into a bar?
    The other one fell over laughing.
    ............................ missed a putt.........................At a Dead & Co. show on a Mexican beach............ another Dead & Co. show at the same beach a year later
    ......................................................
    The real Boraxxe... wearing his "Get off my lawn!" face and his "I smoked my lawn" face, and yes, that's a banana, no, I'm not happy to see you.
    If it's not dangerous, it's not fun!
    Golfing Hobby yes....Golfing Hobby yes

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Location
    Maybury Hill
    Posts
    609
    Quote Originally Posted by Boraxxe View Post
    Two Hobbits walk into a bar.
    One says to the other;
    Did ya hear the one about two hobbits walking into a bar?
    The other one fell over laughing.
    Haha great idea

    How does a hobbit let you know he’s home safe?

    He gives you one ring!
    “...and he lived happily ever after, to the end of his days”

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Under the stairs Bonus Points: 3.14159
    Posts
    3,958
    How do you get down off a hobbit?

    You jump, landing on one foot, then go to the store and buy some chips.


    Edit: Alternative answer: You don't. You get down off a Fell Beast, land on one foot, and then smell bad forever.
    Last edited by Boraxxe; May 19 2019 at 01:01 AM. Reason: Late-nite imbibing
    ............................ missed a putt.........................At a Dead & Co. show on a Mexican beach............ another Dead & Co. show at the same beach a year later
    ......................................................
    The real Boraxxe... wearing his "Get off my lawn!" face and his "I smoked my lawn" face, and yes, that's a banana, no, I'm not happy to see you.
    If it's not dangerous, it's not fun!
    Golfing Hobby yes....Golfing Hobby yes

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Location
    Maybury Hill
    Posts
    609
    Quote Originally Posted by Boraxxe View Post
    How do you get down off a hobbit?

    You jump, landing on one foot, then go to the store and buy some chips.


    Edit: Alternative answer: You don't. You get down off a Fell Beast, land on one foot, and then smell bad forever.
    I think you were definitely imbibing when you wrote that one


    Why wasn’t the hobbit fish and chips shop successful?

    It was only small fry!
    “...and he lived happily ever after, to the end of his days”

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    3,550
    Why do the little people smoke so much weed??

    Because it is hobbit forming.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Rainy WA
    Posts
    180
    Q. What would a hobbit never call a sure thing?

    A. A shoe-in

    ...when in doubt...twirl...

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Under the stairs Bonus Points: 3.14159
    Posts
    3,958
    Didja hear about the stupid hobbit?
    No, how stupid was he?
    He was so stupid that when someone told him "Beware, the ides of March",
    He said, "Nah, ya doan asta worry 'bout them. It's the ooves ya asta worry 'bout."
    ............................ missed a putt.........................At a Dead & Co. show on a Mexican beach............ another Dead & Co. show at the same beach a year later
    ......................................................
    The real Boraxxe... wearing his "Get off my lawn!" face and his "I smoked my lawn" face, and yes, that's a banana, no, I'm not happy to see you.
    If it's not dangerous, it's not fun!
    Golfing Hobby yes....Golfing Hobby yes

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    444
    Quote Originally Posted by Boraxxe View Post
    How do you get down off a hobbit?
    You shave his feet!
    Immigrant from the City of Paragon. We are heroes. This is what we do.

    Founding member of Mornost Gwend of Gladden. "We shout a lot!"

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Rainy WA
    Posts
    180
    Q. Why was Samwise thought to be inept?

    A. He was a real "gaffe"-er


    ...when in doubt...twirl...

 

 

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