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Thread: Moorish Stories

  1. #1

    Moorish Stories

    I've missed Blackadder I most of us that can remember him have. His stories were always a welcome treat after a long boring day in the moors. Well I know I am no Blackadder but hopefully with some help from other peoples contributions we can try and fill the void that has been there ever since Adder left.

    Here is my first attempt at a story from the moors, pretty much a recap from todays actions, I hope you enjoy.





    The Captain and her Runekeeper

    As a breeze whipped though the mighty auroch Rockwither’s legs and wafted over to the two travelling companions Merlinros was reminded of one pungent fact, aurochs don’t bathe. The elf wrinkled his slender nose in distaste, the smell cut straight through him, it made his skin itch from his pointed ears down to his toes. He tried not to show his primness, Commander Farriel by his side, his long standing Captain didn’t suffer foppishness at all. She was a hard woman, good in a fight, quick to encourage and help, yet just as quick to point out your short comings.

    Merlin was digging around in his rune-satchel pretending that he was sorting out his rune-stones for the days hunt, when to be honest only four of them were actually inscribed rune-stones, the rest were mere rocks. To be more honest he was really just waiting for the tears to leave his eyes and the taste of auroch groin to leave his mouth. He heard a soft almost indiscernible sigh from Farriel, then he heard the hoofbeats and had to stop himself from sharing in Farriel’s sigh.

    Merlin’s daughter Swyyper road up on her steed with the bigmouth Shagnificent at her side. Swyyper turned to Merlin and gave him a cheery smile then the same for Farriel as she continued to trot on by at a slow canter, her steed glistening in the sunlight. Merlin was about to return the greeting as Shag chimed in “Better hurry up old man or we’ll kill everything before you get a chance”. Merlin gritted his teeth he knew there was no point jibing back at Shag, it only encouraged him but he couldn’t help himself “My runekeeper captain duo is better than yours Shag”.
    Farriel quickly chipped in “We’re just resting after finishing off Chirontheirish and five of his underlings. They were bullying the hobbits of hoarhallow, we rode in and stomped them”. Shag gave a snort of derision before adding “Brag more about killing children” he laughed and kicked his mount into a gallop as he and swyyper sped off along the Auroch river to take them to the most dangerous part of the ettenmoors that day, beside the new elf camp, word had been spread that it was a death trap to head there.

    Farriel slapped Merlin on the back ordered him on his horse and yelled “Move”. Merlin jumped on that horse straight away tore off after his daughter and her terrible choice in hunting companions. Farriel was slightly ahead as they pulled themselves out of the river and ready to push their way ahead of Shag and Swyyper, however neither was to be seen. The ground felt unnaturally cold to Merlin, he only ever got this sense of foreboding when he was in deep trouble, he was about to warn Farriel to be ready when the first warg took a bite out of his leg. He stumbled with the pain and dropped his rune-satchel, Farriel screamed at him to get up and he felt strength fill his legs. He dove along the ground, grabbed his favourite runestone and sprang to his feet ready to unleash his fury on that warg. With a flash the warg disappeared before his eyes, and two more hit him in the back. Farriel called to him once more but she was cut off as she fended off an arrow. Chirontheirish came screaming out of a hedge of bushes and landed a massive blow with his shield to Merlin’s face. The rest of the fight became quite fuzzy to the rune-keeper, he faintly remembered more warg teeth, a few reaver blades and the odd arrow here and there, not to mention a plethora of curses coming from Farriel.

    As Merlin opened his eyes he realized he was back in Glan Vraig, Farriel and he had been well and truly trounced, pay back for the fights at Hoarhallow obviously. “Sorry Farr”, Merlin apologized to Farriel “I dropped my satchel again” her response was another sigh. A moment later Shagnificent and Swyyper appeared in the rez circle beside them. Shag sneered at Merlin and gloated “We got one kill in that zerg over there how’d you two go” a mocking grin on his face the whole time. Merlin didn’t reply he just looked at Farriel with a sheepish grin. Farriel sighed one final time.
    Last edited by Hoges; Apr 27 2013 at 09:40 AM.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  2. #2
    So true its funny. But you forgot the spiders /sigh. I used to have to poke Blackadder to remember them too. Keep the them coming Merlin. By the way Beard is going to get jealous.
    [charsig=http://lotrosigs.level3.turbine.com/0c21400000000fd3e/01008/signature.png]undefined[/charsig]

  3. #3
    +rep even though the rep system will be taken away soon
    [center][color=red][size=3][color=gold]~[/color]Ittybitty, Reaver[color=gold]~[/color][/size]
    [size=1]Sexylegs, Rank [color=cyan]8[/color] Spider[/size]
    [size=1]Vic, Rank [color=cyan]7[/color] Defiler[/size][/color][/center]

  4. #4
    hahahah this is brilliant Merlin! Please write more! You got Shag spot on:P

    Don't like my companions?? That means Beard too! o: tsk tsk.


    anyways, do write more!
    ./cheers

    ~skmuzy
    [charsig=http://lotrosigs.level3.turbine.com/0c214010000082aa5/signature.png]Skmuzy[/charsig]

  5. #5

    Wink Trolls

    See i have a good story myself. Its about me playing a Mighty troll!

    One day the young Black-arrow was taking a stroll when he suddenly realized, "well looks like its going to be another one of those days." So on this day he suddenly had another one of his MANY great idea's, " I can play a Troll! stop some heads in many throw a few beautiful boulders, maybe swing my great club!" so he set off to Gramsfoot where he was assigned a quest to play as a "mighty" troll. He got the troll and set off on his adventure to Isendeep outpost. A mighty and worthy structure for a troll such as himself. Little did this Troll know that he was going to face an opponent that he could not beat, Mr.Hoardale Waterfall cliff which is a cliff that has conquered many Creeps and Freeps in his days and has never lost a single battle. The troll was feeling confident. He kept saying to himself, "I am a Troll not some wimpy Creep!" If only this poor troll knew what he was going for. Just to be safe in his fight he made a small Group of trusty rank 0 companions who also had never lost a battle. Simply because they had never been in one. By this time the Troll was set. with his group he took off running as fast as he could and took a leap of faith off Mr.Hordale waterfall Cliff. he flew and flew magnificently down and down and as he could see the water SPLASH!!! water flew up everywhere as he landed! But one thing was certain, the Mighty Troll has lost his battle and was Incapacitated by his misadventures. his time has come, his session has ended. The Troll was no longer a Troll but a mighty Blackarrow once more! And he learned his lesson. oh yes he did. you cannot jump off a cliff with a troll because you too will die. Or so he thought because the next time he became a troll he went again but by himself to fight the cliff as to not be slowed down by his companions. He lost again! Oh the inhumanity! So next time he went to fight freeps. Played a little hopscotch to but that's a story for another time!

    ~Gabuscus

    P.S. Great story Merlin
    [charsig=http://lotrosigs.level3.turbine.com/0c2140100000b5d67/signature.png]Gabuscus[/charsig] - Gabuscus

  6. #6
    My names a shoe

    ~Sneakerzz
    [charsig=http://lotrosigs.level3.turbine.com/0c2140100000e9eba/signature.png]Sneakerzz[/charsig]

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Rugallach View Post
    See i have a good story myself. Its about me playing a Mighty troll!

    One day the young Black-arrow was taking a stroll when he suddenly realized, "well looks like its going to be another one of those days." So on this day he suddenly had another one of his MANY great idea's, " I can play a Troll! stop some heads in many throw a few beautiful boulders, maybe swing my great club!" so he set off to Gramsfoot where he was assigned a quest to play as a "mighty" troll. He got the troll and set off on his adventure to Isendeep outpost. A mighty and worthy structure for a troll such as himself. Little did this Troll know that he was going to face an opponent that he could not beat, Mr.Hoardale Waterfall cliff which is a cliff that has conquered many Creeps and Freeps in his days and has never lost a single battle. The troll was feeling confident. He kept saying to himself, "I am a Troll not some wimpy Creep!" If only this poor troll knew what he was going for. Just to be safe in his fight he made a small Group of trusty rank 0 companions who also had never lost a battle. Simply because they had never been in one. By this time the Troll was set. with his group he took off running as fast as he could and took a leap of faith off Mr.Hordale waterfall Cliff. he flew and flew magnificently down and down and as he could see the water SPLASH!!! water flew up everywhere as he landed! But one thing was certain, the Mighty Troll has lost his battle and was Incapacitated by his misadventures. his time has come, his session has ended. The Troll was no longer a Troll but a mighty Blackarrow once more! And he learned his lesson. oh yes he did. you cannot jump off a cliff with a troll because you too will die. Or so he thought because the next time he became a troll he went again but by himself to fight the cliff as to not be slowed down by his companions. He lost again! Oh the inhumanity! So next time he went to fight freeps. Played a little hopscotch to but that's a story for another time!

    ~Gabuscus

    P.S. Great story Merlin
    Haha, I liked it ^^


    Crickhollow l Thorfinn || r14 champ, r12 burglar- Crickhollow || r11//r9 warg Crick//Elendilmir || + other stuff

  8. #8
    Join Date
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    Indiana
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    I roflmao Merlin I didn't know Blackadder, but I like this idea. My take on the story was a bit different, so here's my version (excuse ma bad English >.>)


    The Wise Old Wizard and his Captain

    After a long day of serving the king and taking care of her offspring, Farriel finally arrived at Ettenmoors, the battlefield, where her heart truly belonged. “Any disturbances?” she asked. Immediately, Lieutenant Merlinros, a soft-spoken old wizard, called her to his side. The rumor had it that this quiet wizard was the most deadly of all. Farriel knew her newly earned rank meant nothing in the battlefield. Only the experience and wisdom made the difference. So she decided to follow his lead. Trotting out of Glan Vraig, this wizard was fast. His horse seemed like it was gliding in the air, Farriel tried to catch up to him. When she caught up to him half way down the hill, he was fighting Kitwen, one of the most feared of all spiders. Farriel quickly ran to the side of Merlin, but before she could throw in her first blow, Kitwen was dead. Farriel gasped and asked Merlin how he did that. He gently smiled and said, “I hit hard.”

    Then, someone yelled “Elf camp under attack!! Massive attack!” Farriel hopped on the horse, took a deep breath getting ready for bloodbath! Merlin quietly said, “Let’s not go there. Let’s make sure our hobbit friends are safe.” Farriel sighed in disappointment, but she followed the wizard, because she knew that he knew better. Again the wizard glided away without hesitation. Farriel stopped for a second, because a hawk came to her with a message from a friend. When she arrived at the small hobbit town, Merlin was nowhere to be seen, but she saw some hobbits running towards the mayor’s house. As she approached the mayor’s house, she heard a warleader roar. They are here! Merlin was right…

    Chirontheirish was harassing the Mayor, and two bloodthirsty reavers and two wargs were beating up Merlin, he was at near death. Farriel quickly uttered some words of courage, but they did nothing, so she threw herself in front of the wizard to take some damage onto herself. Finally, one reaver was down, but she felt arrows piercing her back. A cowardly blackarrow was shooting her from behind a tree… The wargs did not rest, and Merlin fell. Before Farriel could use her resurrection spell, one of the wargs stunned her. There was no hope. Farriel fell, taking down one of the wargs with her.

    When she woke up in Glan Vraig, Merlin was already on the horse. Farriel dusted her armors off and dragged herself onto the horse. The old wizard cheerfully said “Let’s go back there, Commander Farriel!” She sighed.
    [IMG]http://oi41.tinypic.com/14v1utt.jpg[/IMG]
    Farrielle R13 Captain (BW), Archaniel R8 Hunter (CH), Farrial R8 Minstrel (CH)
    Farrball R9 Stalker (CH), Kumosan R8 Weaver (CH), Vapour R6 Reaver (CH)

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by Farriel View Post
    I roflmao Merlin I didn't know Blackadder, but I like this idea. My take on the story was a bit different, so here's my version (excuse ma bad English >.>)


    The Wise Old Wizard and his Captain

    After a long day of serving the king and taking care of her offspring, Farriel finally arrived at Ettenmoors, the battlefield, where her heart truly belonged. “Any disturbances?” she asked. Immediately, Lieutenant Merlinros, a soft-spoken old wizard, called her to his side. The rumor had it that this quiet wizard was the most deadly of all. Farriel knew her newly earned rank meant nothing in the battlefield. Only the experience and wisdom made the difference. So she decided to follow his lead. Trotting out of Glan Vraig, this wizard was fast. His horse seemed like it was gliding in the air, Farriel tried to catch up to him. When she caught up to him half way down the hill, he was fighting Kitwen, one of the most feared of all spiders. Farriel quickly ran to the side of Merlin, but before she could throw in her first blow, Kitwen was dead. Farriel gasped and asked Merlin how he did that. He gently smiled and said, “I hit hard.”

    Then, someone yelled “Elf camp under attack!! Massive attack!” Farriel hopped on the horse, took a deep breath getting ready for bloodbath! Merlin quietly said, “Let’s not go there. Let’s make sure our hobbit friends are safe.” Farriel sighed in disappointment, but she followed the wizard, because she knew that he knew better. Again the wizard glided away without hesitation. Farriel stopped for a second, because a hawk came to her with a message from a friend. When she arrived at the small hobbit town, Merlin was nowhere to be seen, but she saw some hobbits running towards the mayor’s house. As she approached the mayor’s house, she heard a warleader roar. They are here! Merlin was right…

    Chirontheirish was harassing the Mayor, and two bloodthirsty reavers and two wargs were beating up Merlin, he was at near death. Farriel quickly uttered some words of courage, but they did nothing, so she threw herself in front of the wizard to take some damage onto herself. Finally, one reaver was down, but she felt arrows piercing her back. A cowardly blackarrow was shooting her from behind a tree… The wargs did not rest, and Merlin fell. Before Farriel could use her resurrection spell, one of the wargs stunned her. There was no hope. Farriel fell, taking down one of the wargs with her.

    When she woke up in Glan Vraig, Merlin was already on the horse. Farriel dusted her armors off and dragged herself onto the horse. The old wizard cheerfully said “Let’s go back there, Commander Farriel!” She sighed.
    Love the prequel Farriel . Enjoyed the read too, your English wasn't hard to read at all.

    I'm about 1/3 through writing my second story which is another recap, less humour in this coming one. I have an idea for the 3rd as well. But after that I'm hoping to get some ideas from other people in the moors. Let me know of your days events, ways you'd like your character written and I will see what I can do .

    Even though I like writing and posting stories here, I'd love to continue to read from other people as well. I miss those Blackadder stories, takes a lot of the animosity out of the game and a fun way to recap/bring life to our pixels smashing into each other.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Behind you
    Posts
    376
    I better be in your next one or else...
    [URL=http://s1201.photobucket.com/user/GoDFa7h3r/media/rsz_screenshot000201_zps322d3f9a.jpg.html][IMG]http://i1201.photobucket.com/albums/bb347/GoDFa7h3r/rsz_screenshot000201_zps322d3f9a.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
    Burzan aka Trompok(BW) - R14 Reaver
    Looks like meat's back on the menu boys!

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by 1nTruDeR View Post
    I better be in your next one or else...
    I actually have a fight in mind that I could write into a story. That will be the 3rd story, the 4th I am going to write from creepside about my spider. After that I'd like to write about other peoples toons, so please anyone get in contact with me about ideas and stuff . If I get a solid build of characters and everyone likes where my stories are heading I might try something bigger, multi part stories with some completely imagined events.
    Last edited by Hoges; Apr 29 2013 at 06:26 AM.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  12. #12
    Blooding(?) The New Meat

    Sunlight pierced through breaks in the clouded sky. A ray of light streamed down onto the cliff face affectionately known as the fire escape. Howling wind whipped up and down the craggily rock face, racing across the well-worn path, scattering leaf and pebble off the plummeting cliff height. A fallen sapling battled the wind, gripping on with all its strength, reaching for that ray of light and a break from the blistering cold and stifling wind. A heavy pounding hoof came down upon the struggling sapling crushing its hopes of survival as a midnight black steed was slowed to a halt.

    Merlin’s golden mullet rippled in the wind, his hairs ornaments lost to the first gust of wind that he rode into. He leaned over the large steed’s back to pat along its strong neck and shoulder to calm the veteran war-steed Pitch. Merlin’s superior elf hearing had picked the tell-tale call of a brown speckled white owl through the roaring weather. As he looked up he caught sight of the beautiful animal descending down to him, he held out his arm for the bird to land on. The claws clutched his forearm firmly and Merlin quickly untied the message bound to its leg. He bid the owl safe journey and read the urgent message

    Merlin my friend, get your lazy backside up to Grothum beasts need slaying and you need the practice. Darkswolfshadow, Bobinhood and Roglas are harassing us, be here quick.
    ~Saldrin

    Merlin never could work out how Saldrin always knew immediately when he entered the fabled hunting grounds of the Ettenmoors and would dispatch his owl with the latest tidings of the days hunt. He kicked Pitch into a steady gallop thinking of the upcoming battle. Darkwolf was a master of escape and a lot tougher than many gave him credit. He had quickly arisen through the ranks of creep horde and was piling up man elf hobbit and dwarf trophies alike. His strength really came from his knowledge of alchemy. His use of blood potions, solvents, magic brands and bottled fury was second to none, if he’d been born a free person he’d be a true master within the scholar’s guild. This knowledge along with his natural warg strength, agility and added tenacity to get a kill made Darkwolf a worthy adversary. Bobinhood was the next most dangerous, a black arrow and student of alchemy like Darkwolf, but not merely as well versed. Bobin was an archer with a powerful bow, and he was fairly accurate with it, but his use of man blood and magical potions made him formidable. Roglas was a bit of a wild card, at times the pesky spider could make your day difficult, slinging webs venom and acid in seemingly random attacks. If those webs happened to hit you though they could slow you to a halt.

    Merlin had summed up the fight by the time his steed Pitch was gliding past the massive mountain keep of Ost Ringdyr. The walls were daunting, the Captain-General inside was a beast among men, but neither were Ost Ringdyr’s most famous feature. The wooden statue of Third-Marshal Kickstand still hung in the forward window of the great keep. His Iconic bald head and powerful crossbow a constant reminder of the death that could hail down upon creeps at any moment. Kickstand had moved on from his confines of Ost Ringdyr, no one quite knew where, but the legend of Kickstand was so well known that just the reminder of his scowling hobbit face in the window was enough to make creeps question if he was really gone or not. Merlin refocused on the job at hand as the entrance to Grothum loomed ahead of him. He pulled Pitch to a halt and dismounted the horse, the wind quickly whipped away the dust kicked up by the speedy dismount. Merlin walked hurriedly into the main square of Grothum, the wind was helping mask the terrible smell of the place. Goblin corpses were sprawled everywhere, planted on barricades, legs sticking out of cook pots and a real good showing of goblin insides crushed and seeping out from under a troll corpse littered with rows. Saldrin was definitely here, Merlin followed the trail of carnage to his friend.
    The tall elven hunter dumped another goblin carcass onto the stack of dead near the western Grothum gate. The golbins were more of an annoyance rather than a threat, still as they kept trailing in one after the other their bodies began to clutter the pathway and Saldrin liked a clear space to move around in a tussle. A voice started nattering in Saldrin’s ear yet again, it was the voice of the young guardsman that he’d saved from Darkwolf as this little fight began. He hadn’t bothered to learn the so-called captain’s name. He was a typical new recruit, prancing around in his gleaming white platemail trimmed with silken tassels with a tall feathered plume jutting from his conical helmet. The armour somehow managed to provide him little protection yet also be bulky and ungainly, almost as ungainly as the man underneath the armour. He didn’t listen to what his companion was saying to him, in fact he hadn’t listened to anything he’d been saying to him since the endeavour began, the man wasn’t making any sense anyway. Saldrin was thankful for two things this night, the wind making it easier to drown out the captain’s voice, and the captain always being his enemies first target. A faint scrape of a claw across a pebble along the pathway caught Saldrin’s attention, Darkwolf was watching them. Saldrin could sense the pounce was coming when a second sound cut through the howling weather, Merlin was stomping through Grothum like an auroch on heat. Darkwolf melted back into the shadows to reassess the situation.

    “Hail Saldrin”, Merlin called as he approached his fellow elf. Saldrin was wearing the same grin across his face he always did, Merlin wasn’t fooled. The smiling Saldrin was a façade, the elf underneath the smile was a serious combatant and death with a bow. “Who is the fresh face, some hot shot Captain I should meet”?
    “No time Merlin, the fight begins”. With that Saldrin turned droped to one knee and released an arrow all in one fluid motion. The arrow raced through the sky took a nasty curve from a gust of wind and planted itself at the base of Roglas’ arachnid head. Three more swiftly fired arrows follow planting into the weaver as it gave out a screech and shrivelled up. Bobinhood barrelled up the path showering Merlin with a barrage of arrows. Merlin tried to dodge to the side but Darkwolf took his legs out and hamstrung him. Dazed Merlin desperately threw up his magical shield to save himself readying for that surge of strength to bolster him from the Captain nearby. The strength never came, a loud clang sounded as the captain’s heavy shield clattered on the ground, panic stricken the greeny captain turned and ran into Grothum. Merlin fought on desperately landing as many lightning strikes into Bobinhood as possible, arrows flying left and right zipping past him the swirling wind obviously affected Bobin. Merlin gave everything he had into one final strike as Saldrin turned his bow and launched a devastating strike smashing into the uruk’s chest. The joint attack was enough to bring down the black arrow and Merlin fell face first into the cold dirt as Darkwolf clawed him in the back. Saldrin then turned on Darkwolf he was able to pepper the warg with enough arrows to scare it off.

    Merlin was lifted off the ground by his elven friend and congratulated on a nice fight. “Guys”, they both heard from above. The duo turned to see the young captain perched atop a small ledge, beaming with pride “They can’t get me up here fellas so I’m going to stay up here and help out”. Merlin turned to Saldrin astonished ready to ask how he was going to help out from up there but Saldrin had turned from Merlin hiding a smile now that a second was sharing in his frustration.
    “Its ok mate”, Merlin called “You can come on down, these guys will be more interested in me than you. I promise”. The reply came as a flat out refusal to come down, that he was much safer atop his protective perch. Merlin turned again to Saldrin to vent his bewilderment but was forestalled by a raised hand towards his face. “Here they come again Merlin, maybe if you listen to the Captain you won’t be face deep in dirt at the end of this round” Saldrin jested. Several battles ensued each ending in the same way with two or three of the creeps dead and Merlin lying face first in the dirt.

    Hours passed and it was eventually time for the small fellowship to break up, the Captain needed help down from his perch but once his feet hit the ground he started boasting of his involvement in the fights and how he barely even raised a sweat. Merlin and Saldrin just shook their heads and slowly cantered off towards Glan Vraig. “Thanks for the pleasant evening Saldrin”, Merlin whispered to the hunter with only a hint of sarcasm “Your Captain friend was a big help”.
    “I don’t even know the man” Saldrin laughed “I just wanted another body between me and him, you did fine”. Merlin just shook his head as he watched the Captain ride deeper into the Ettenmoors pumped up with new found confidence. A cloud of dust kicked up and it was clear that Darkwolf was in hot pursuit.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  13. #13
    Funnelweb’s Lament

    Thick fog had been spreading from Lugazag keep east to the Hoarhallow waterfall and as far north as the mountain entrenched camp of Gramsfoot. Tall wooden spikes marked the entrance of the creep stronghold rising out of the ground forming a wall. The fog rapped around the massive spears, the moisture seeping into the wood reawakening movement in decade old congealed bloodstains bringing out the old smells of rotting flesh. The sun was just starting to crest the horizon, signalling the start of a new day. The sunrays did little to break the fog, thinning it mildly, yet the denizens of Gramsfoot began to stir nonetheless. One inhabitant in particular had awoken. Tunnelled deep beneath the ground the spider Funnelweb was coming out from a deep hibernation.

    The arachnid pulled her thick hairy brown body to the lid of her trapdoor sanctuary. She peered out and fog immediately raced down to fill the deep tunnel. Uruks and orcs were slowly moving about the camp, stretching from an uncomfortable sleep on the grimy floor. Slanginrocks moved his rotund body over to the nearest cook pot lit it with a wave of his staff and started putting together a broth. Lumps of slug meat were dumped in the large pot bubbling and churning away over the roaring campfire. Slug meat melted away thickening the broth nearly to the point of slime, man and elf ears were added next and the sickly sweet aroma filled the air. As the smell wafted through the encampment the orcs and uruks sprang to life. Grunting and moaning filled the air as hairy sweaty bodies started pulling themselves to their feet. Weavers began to descend from cliff tops, out of rocky outcroppings and from beneath the earth. Some wargs started stir, but only enough to move the few inches into a better ray of sunlight and fall back into a slumber. The newer recruits all began to gravitate towards the now simmering stew that boiled away before the fat defiler. “Aargh done”, Slanginrocks announced in a craggily voice as the sludgy broth turned to a think orange. Igank the young reaver pushed through the massing crowd of scrawny recruits, helmet of a dead guardsman in hand and a salivating grin spread across his orc face already littered in battle scars. Igank managed to dip the helmet into the broth before he was rapped on the head by a thick knobbly staff. “Mine”, Slanginrocks roared as he picked up the entire cauldron of stew wedged it against his thick girth and waddled over to a corner of the camp where he began to devour the entire pot.

    Funnelweb sighed inwardly, life hadn’t really changed in Gramsfoot apparently. Some of the faces were new, some of the faces were old but it was all the same really. She made her way through the camp entrance wondering why she bothered to wake, her whole body ached from the cold and it appeared to be back to the same hum drum life again. Funnel moved past the protective barricade of the encampment to peer down onto the slug pit. Ittybitty was still standing in the same spot she last saw him at, going through the same routine he always had. The monstrous orc was wearing his finest armour, barely rusted at all with some spots still undented. He was standing right at the edge of the slug pit staring down into his own reflection repeating the same words over and over in a questioning tone “Itty, Bitty”? Most of Sauron’s servants thought of Ittybitty as a simpleton, and to be honest they weren’t completely wrong. Funnelweb knew more about the fearsome battle-hardened reaver though, he wasn’t simply trying to speak to his reflection, he was trying to romance his reflection. Itty had long been in love with the orc in the water no one else knew his secret. No one else had risked the psychotic reaver’s wrath by actually talking to him. Funnel crawled down the vertical rock face across from Itty and whispered to him with a raspy voice across the murky pool “Hello Itty”.
    Ittybitty looked up from the prettiest orc he’d ever seen to fix his eyes on the spider “Good to see you Funnelweb”? he replied in that same questioning tone. It was unfortunate but everything Itty said came out as a question. Funnel moved onto breakfast descending on an unaware slug rapping all eight legs around the fat juicy body. The slug writhed under the pressure splashing murky yellowed water about until a thick web coiled around its body to immobilise it. The spider sunk her fangs into the meal drinking deep.

    Funnelweb was heading back up the steady slope into Gramsfoot when a shocking sight caught her eye. A tall black arrow was strutting his way out the entrance boasting to any who would listen about who would be dining on his arrows today. Funnel scurried up to the tall uruk and stammered bewildered “Gabascus you’re a Lieutenant?! How is that possible who would make a maggot like you a Lieutenant”?
    Gabascus was taken aback “You can’t speak to me like that anymore Funnel, you’re just a lowly Chief Warrior I’m the Lieutenant if you don’t show me some respect I will tell…..”. Funnelweb stormed off away from the yammering Gabascus, who was quickly turning his tirade back into a boast of how many man finger’s he had shoved in his loincloth as trophies from his victims. The weaver was distraught, Gabascus a Lieutenant he was a simple Sentry when they’d last seen each other, Funnel needed to get to the bottom of this, she needed to speak with the brood mother.

    Funnelweb skittered past trolls and orcs as she raced up the ramp to Kitwen’s domain. As Funnel crested the rise she finally broke free from the chilly fog into a glorious morning. Kitwen had always enjoyed the high cliff tops, separating herself from the orc filth below. Funnel turned from the warmth of the morning Sun to lay her eyes on the enormous form of the brood mother, now this was a spider you wanted to become. Lounging beside her was the warg Skmuzy, Funnelweb suppressed a hiss. She’d never liked the warg much not that they had ever had any altercations, it was perhaps more a touch of jealousy. Skmuzy’s beauty was renowned among the male member of Gramsfoot. Frankly the weaver wasn’t impressed, that thick chest, legs and all that fur were repulsive to her, although she had to admit the sultry voice and the sway to Skmuzy’s hips were….intriguing. “Excuse me brood-mother”, Funnelweb interrupted “Is it true, why are so many lowly recruits highly ranked now”. Kitwen turned to her daughter with an exacerbated sigh, as Skmuzy slowly excused herself from the meeting, sauntering off into the fog with a sickening gaggle of orc and warg flocking after her.
    “My child”, Kitwen began “You have slumbered for many months, the world does not stop just because you sleep. I have told you many times, ones deeds are what bring them recognition in this world. Yours I am afraid have all but been forgotten”. Funnelweb felt as though her world had been rocked, she’d once been considered one of the most fearsome spiders in all the Ettenmoors. How could this have happened to her, it wasn’t fair!
    “What can I do Mother”, Funnelweb stammered “Don’t let me be forgotten like some relic of the past I won’t be another Pariah”.
    “You know the answer Funnel, it is obvious to you”, Kitwen answered sagely “You just need to begin again”. Funnelweb shook with anger, this wasn’t right she tried to fill herself with resolve, it helped little. Funnel turned to leave, the deed had been laid before her, she needed to start slaying again and re-earn her fame as a fearsome combatant. “One more thing”, Kitwen interjected forestalling Funnel’s departure “When you had been asleep so long we started grooming your replacement”. Funnel’s heart dropped. “Her name is Funnelweb also, she is young but a feisty little thing”, Kitwen continued “You shall be her mentor”. With that Kitwen turned away from the annoyed spider, and Funnelweb continued out of Gramsfoot as a little spider no more than a hatchling scurried up to her side. It was time for the weaver to lay waste to the Ettenmoors and become the thing of children’s nightmares again.

    Funnelweb’s quest to retake her rightful place among the elite began. She was a patient hunter burrowing in high traffic areas, with unsuspecting free people walking overheard. She would bide her time waiting for the right target. Hunters trailing at the back of the pack or a runekeeper out for their morning walk, even burglars that thought they were being sneakier than they really were. The trophies were mounting up quickly elf ears, man legs, hobbit feet and her favourite dwarf beards. Footmen, Guardsmen and Men-at-arms they all fell in their dozens to her might. Even little Funnelweb had managed to take down a few, earning the respect of her mentor. The weaver was on a high, fuelled by her success blood boiling ready to take down any foe, a horse sounded….the hoof beat was off like it was galloping and jumping constantly. Funnel peaked out of her burrow ready to pounce to take down this next foe and saw a giant red mop of hair and long beard blowing in the wind atop the jumping horse. The grizzled veteran Second-marshall Thorfinn went trundling by, Funnel quickly tucked back down into her burrow, thankfully the fog had obscured her from Thorfinn. The spider may have been excited for a kill but she definitely wasn’t suicidal.

    A second horse started cantering down by her burrow at the base of Glan Vraig hill. She peaked out of her trapdoor and saw the buxom Captain Iriddian gliding by. This was the kill she had been waiting for, a Commander, this would surely regain her honours. As Iriddian’s horse jumped over a log in the middle of the clearing Funnel let loose a web to knock the captain to the ground. She hit hard, head rocking against the packed dirt. She came to her feet roaring, a deep almost manly voice emanating from this large woman “Where are you, you coward come out and face me like a man” a deep belly laugh followed after the outburst. Funnelweb stay low to the ground shrouded by fog, she was starting to rethink this plan, this Captain was quite clearing maniacal. As the captain lost interest and began search for her horse the weaver pounced, spray the heavily armoured woman with webs nearly immobilizing her, she then started firing rapid spits of toxin and venom all over the Captain. Iriddian turned with a grin spread across her mouth “You are mine insect”, she bellowed. The Captain came roaring after the spider armour clanking away, the noise echoing across the surrounding hills. Funnelweb turned and ran, it wasn’t a very brave reaction but it was her first reaction so she went with it. After several minutes and many, many curses the Captain began to tire. Funnelweb turned on the woman and started attacking with renewed vigour her terror leaving her momentarily. It was clear that Funnelweb was the quicker of the two, and in a long drawn out fight she slowly covered the Captain in poison and ran from her, until the woman fell to her feet one last word escaping from her mouth “Lame”.

    Funnelweb entered Gramsfoot elated, bragging to any who would listen of the new list of her accomplishments. As she made her way to the tyrant loud and proud she demanded her promotion. The tyrant looked down on her sneered and then laughed in her face “You boast of killing a Captain? You are a spider, your little pet beside you has killed dozens that is no challenge. As for all these other trophies you have collected. Give them to Slanginrocks they will taste nice but they are worth no more than that. BEGONE”! Funnelweb fled from the tyrant down trodden. These kills meant nothing, was she forever going to be a Chief Warrior and nothing more? She needed something bigger she needed to bring in a trophy that people would fear, that people would find disbelieving. A group of fresh recruits to her side brought her, her answer “Merlinros, I hate that guy”, they all roared in unison. “Guy zaps you before you even see him, coward rune-keeper”. This perked an idea, a rune-keeper that people feared, surely the spider could take out a measly rune-keeper then people would respect her again.

    Funnelweb snuck right to foot of Glan Vraig covered by fog and burrowed beneath the trees, to her luck two veteran free people were speaking of her prey at that very moment. Rastorn leant over to Farriel with merriment painted across his face “I thought Merlinros would be here celebrating his promotion”, Rastorn slurred, the elf was clearly drunk.
    “He is down in Hoarhallow messing about with that hobbit Woman”, Farriel replied “He always goes down there when he has had too much to drink. He thinks we don’t know about her but, every hobbit in Hoarhallow knows about it. Marigold can’t keep quiet about her exploits with the famous rune-keeper”. With that Funnelweb sprayed a quick web over the two and tore off towards Hoarhallow she faintly heard Rastorn through the night air “Aahh what was that”.

    It was not hard for Funnelweb to locate this Marigold’s house in Hoarhallow. It was the one on the edge of town with the horrible noises coming out of it. Funnel decided not to think of what foul events were going on within the doors and burrowed waiting for her pray. Luckily the commotion didn’t last long. The door to the hovel opened spreading candle light over the cobblestone path Merlin stepped out barely able to stand. “Thank you for a love*hic*ly even Miss Marigold, stay purdy and look after those feet”, he slurred waggling his eyebrows up and down. With that he stumbled off into the woods, mere feet from the burrowed Funnelweb. The rune-keeper bumped into several trees before he lent himself up against one, hand extended in an attempt to relieve himself over the ground. He only made it as far as his rune-satchel, Funnelweb pounced ready to claim the easy kill.

    Gabascus watched from the safety of a distant tree. The spider was moving very quickly and Merlin for most of the fight was staring at the ground while lightning was flailing out from him wildly. This was clearly a battle of epic proportions, and Gabascus knew because he had been in epic battles before. Gabascus thought of moving in quickly to end the fight, it was only a matter of time before Funnel would need his help. It was at that moment that Merlin dropped to his knees raising a shaking hand clutching a runestone toward the feeble spider. This was Gab’s chance to be a hero again, he fired and arrow it plunged through the rune-keepers chest, finishing the fight and saving the scared spider. He strutted over loud, proud and ready to claim his trophy.

    Funnelweb stood stunned. This drunk rune-keeper hadn’t even landed a single blow to the spider. He was absolutely drenched in venom, but there sticking from his chest was the tell-tale killing blow a giant arrow. Funnel looked up with ferocity in all of her eyes as the large uruk Gabascus lent down cut-away an ear from the rune-keeper and simply said “You’re welcome”.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  14. #14
    what has happened to you merl?
    Your misconceptions and fantasies along with your misguided sense of entitlement don't dictate my actions.

  15. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by Spider29 View Post
    what has happened to you merl?
    RP'ing like a beast.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  16. #16
    Haha, those are great merl, I almost spit out my lunch when i read of Kickstands statue in OR.....That was funny

    Keep em coming...I love the stories, even ones of "lame" kiting spiders...woot

    Iri

  17. #17

    I approve of this message xD

    Quote Originally Posted by Hoges View Post
    Funnelweb’s Lament

    Thick fog had been spreading from Lugazag keep east to the Hoarhallow waterfall and as far north as the mountain entrenched camp of Gramsfoot. Tall wooden spikes marked the entrance of the creep stronghold rising out of the ground forming a wall. The fog rapped around the massive spears, the moisture seeping into the wood reawakening movement in decade old congealed bloodstains bringing out the old smells of rotting flesh. The sun was just starting to crest the horizon, signalling the start of a new day. The sunrays did little to break the fog, thinning it mildly, yet the denizens of Gramsfoot began to stir nonetheless. One inhabitant in particular had awoken. Tunnelled deep beneath the ground the spider Funnelweb was coming out from a deep hibernation.

    The arachnid pulled her thick hairy brown body to the lid of her trapdoor sanctuary. She peered out and fog immediately raced down to fill the deep tunnel. Uruks and orcs were slowly moving about the camp, stretching from an uncomfortable sleep on the grimy floor. Slanginrocks moved his rotund body over to the nearest cook pot lit it with a wave of his staff and started putting together a broth. Lumps of slug meat were dumped in the large pot bubbling and churning away over the roaring campfire. Slug meat melted away thickening the broth nearly to the point of slime, man and elf ears were added next and the sickly sweet aroma filled the air. As the smell wafted through the encampment the orcs and uruks sprang to life. Grunting and moaning filled the air as hairy sweaty bodies started pulling themselves to their feet. Weavers began to descend from cliff tops, out of rocky outcroppings and from beneath the earth. Some wargs started stir, but only enough to move the few inches into a better ray of sunlight and fall back into a slumber. The newer recruits all began to gravitate towards the now simmering stew that boiled away before the fat defiler. “Aargh done”, Slanginrocks announced in a craggily voice as the sludgy broth turned to a think orange. Igank the young reaver pushed through the massing crowd of scrawny recruits, helmet of a dead guardsman in hand and a salivating grin spread across his orc face already littered in battle scars. Igank managed to dip the helmet into the broth before he was rapped on the head by a thick knobbly staff. “Mine”, Slanginrocks roared as he picked up the entire cauldron of stew wedged it against his thick girth and waddled over to a corner of the camp where he began to devour the entire pot.

    Funnelweb sighed inwardly, life hadn’t really changed in Gramsfoot apparently. Some of the faces were new, some of the faces were old but it was all the same really. She made her way through the camp entrance wondering why she bothered to wake, her whole body ached from the cold and it appeared to be back to the same hum drum life again. Funnel moved past the protective barricade of the encampment to peer down onto the slug pit. Ittybitty was still standing in the same spot she last saw him at, going through the same routine he always had. The monstrous orc was wearing his finest armour, barely rusted at all with some spots still undented. He was standing right at the edge of the slug pit staring down into his own reflection repeating the same words over and over in a questioning tone “Itty, Bitty”? Most of Sauron’s servants thought of Ittybitty as a simpleton, and to be honest they weren’t completely wrong. Funnelweb knew more about the fearsome battle-hardened reaver though, he wasn’t simply trying to speak to his reflection, he was trying to romance his reflection. Itty had long been in love with the orc in the water no one else knew his secret. No one else had risked the psychotic reaver’s wrath by actually talking to him. Funnel crawled down the vertical rock face across from Itty and whispered to him with a raspy voice across the murky pool “Hello Itty”.
    Ittybitty looked up from the prettiest orc he’d ever seen to fix his eyes on the spider “Good to see you Funnelweb”? he replied in that same questioning tone. It was unfortunate but everything Itty said came out as a question. Funnel moved onto breakfast descending on an unaware slug rapping all eight legs around the fat juicy body. The slug writhed under the pressure splashing murky yellowed water about until a thick web coiled around its body to immobilise it. The spider sunk her fangs into the meal drinking deep.

    Funnelweb was heading back up the steady slope into Gramsfoot when a shocking sight caught her eye. A tall black arrow was strutting his way out the entrance boasting to any who would listen about who would be dining on his arrows today. Funnel scurried up to the tall uruk and stammered bewildered “Gabascus you’re a Lieutenant?! How is that possible who would make a maggot like you a Lieutenant”?
    Gabascus was taken aback “You can’t speak to me like that anymore Funnel, you’re just a lowly Chief Warrior I’m the Lieutenant if you don’t show me some respect I will tell…..”. Funnelweb stormed off away from the yammering Gabascus, who was quickly turning his tirade back into a boast of how many man finger’s he had shoved in his loincloth as trophies from his victims. The weaver was distraught, Gabascus a Lieutenant he was a simple Sentry when they’d last seen each other, Funnel needed to get to the bottom of this, she needed to speak with the brood mother.

    Funnelweb skittered past trolls and orcs as she raced up the ramp to Kitwen’s domain. As Funnel crested the rise she finally broke free from the chilly fog into a glorious morning. Kitwen had always enjoyed the high cliff tops, separating herself from the orc filth below. Funnel turned from the warmth of the morning Sun to lay her eyes on the enormous form of the brood mother, now this was a spider you wanted to become. Lounging beside her was the warg Skmuzy, Funnelweb suppressed a hiss. She’d never liked the warg much not that they had ever had any altercations, it was perhaps more a touch of jealousy. Skmuzy’s beauty was renowned among the male member of Gramsfoot. Frankly the weaver wasn’t impressed, that thick chest, legs and all that fur were repulsive to her, although she had to admit the sultry voice and the sway to Skmuzy’s hips were….intriguing. “Excuse me brood-mother”, Funnelweb interrupted “Is it true, why are so many lowly recruits highly ranked now”. Kitwen turned to her daughter with an exacerbated sigh, as Skmuzy slowly excused herself from the meeting, sauntering off into the fog with a sickening gaggle of orc and warg flocking after her.
    “My child”, Kitwen began “You have slumbered for many months, the world does not stop just because you sleep. I have told you many times, ones deeds are what bring them recognition in this world. Yours I am afraid have all but been forgotten”. Funnelweb felt as though her world had been rocked, she’d once been considered one of the most fearsome spiders in all the Ettenmoors. How could this have happened to her, it wasn’t fair!
    “What can I do Mother”, Funnelweb stammered “Don’t let me be forgotten like some relic of the past I won’t be another Pariah”.
    “You know the answer Funnel, it is obvious to you”, Kitwen answered sagely “You just need to begin again”. Funnelweb shook with anger, this wasn’t right she tried to fill herself with resolve, it helped little. Funnel turned to leave, the deed had been laid before her, she needed to start slaying again and re-earn her fame as a fearsome combatant. “One more thing”, Kitwen interjected forestalling Funnel’s departure “When you had been asleep so long we started grooming your replacement”. Funnel’s heart dropped. “Her name is Funnelweb also, she is young but a feisty little thing”, Kitwen continued “You shall be her mentor”. With that Kitwen turned away from the annoyed spider, and Funnelweb continued out of Gramsfoot as a little spider no more than a hatchling scurried up to her side. It was time for the weaver to lay waste to the Ettenmoors and become the thing of children’s nightmares again.

    Funnelweb’s quest to retake her rightful place among the elite began. She was a patient hunter burrowing in high traffic areas, with unsuspecting free people walking overheard. She would bide her time waiting for the right target. Hunters trailing at the back of the pack or a runekeeper out for their morning walk, even burglars that thought they were being sneakier than they really were. The trophies were mounting up quickly elf ears, man legs, hobbit feet and her favourite dwarf beards. Footmen, Guardsmen and Men-at-arms they all fell in their dozens to her might. Even little Funnelweb had managed to take down a few, earning the respect of her mentor. The weaver was on a high, fuelled by her success blood boiling ready to take down any foe, a horse sounded….the hoof beat was off like it was galloping and jumping constantly. Funnel peaked out of her burrow ready to pounce to take down this next foe and saw a giant red mop of hair and long beard blowing in the wind atop the jumping horse. The grizzled veteran Second-marshall Thorfinn went trundling by, Funnel quickly tucked back down into her burrow, thankfully the fog had obscured her from Thorfinn. The spider may have been excited for a kill but she definitely wasn’t suicidal.

    A second horse started cantering down by her burrow at the base of Glan Vraig hill. She peaked out of her trapdoor and saw the buxom Captain Iriddian gliding by. This was the kill she had been waiting for, a Commander, this would surely regain her honours. As Iriddian’s horse jumped over a log in the middle of the clearing Funnel let loose a web to knock the captain to the ground. She hit hard, head rocking against the packed dirt. She came to her feet roaring, a deep almost manly voice emanating from this large woman “Where are you, you coward come out and face me like a man” a deep belly laugh followed after the outburst. Funnelweb stay low to the ground shrouded by fog, she was starting to rethink this plan, this Captain was quite clearing maniacal. As the captain lost interest and began search for her horse the weaver pounced, spray the heavily armoured woman with webs nearly immobilizing her, she then started firing rapid spits of toxin and venom all over the Captain. Iriddian turned with a grin spread across her mouth “You are mine insect”, she bellowed. The Captain came roaring after the spider armour clanking away, the noise echoing across the surrounding hills. Funnelweb turned and ran, it wasn’t a very brave reaction but it was her first reaction so she went with it. After several minutes and many, many curses the Captain began to tire. Funnelweb turned on the woman and started attacking with renewed vigour her terror leaving her momentarily. It was clear that Funnelweb was the quicker of the two, and in a long drawn out fight she slowly covered the Captain in poison and ran from her, until the woman fell to her feet one last word escaping from her mouth “Lame”.

    Funnelweb entered Gramsfoot elated, bragging to any who would listen of the new list of her accomplishments. As she made her way to the tyrant loud and proud she demanded her promotion. The tyrant looked down on her sneered and then laughed in her face “You boast of killing a Captain? You are a spider, your little pet beside you has killed dozens that is no challenge. As for all these other trophies you have collected. Give them to Slanginrocks they will taste nice but they are worth no more than that. BEGONE”! Funnelweb fled from the tyrant down trodden. These kills meant nothing, was she forever going to be a Chief Warrior and nothing more? She needed something bigger she needed to bring in a trophy that people would fear, that people would find disbelieving. A group of fresh recruits to her side brought her, her answer “Merlinros, I hate that guy”, they all roared in unison. “Guy zaps you before you even see him, coward rune-keeper”. This perked an idea, a rune-keeper that people feared, surely the spider could take out a measly rune-keeper then people would respect her again.

    Funnelweb snuck right to foot of Glan Vraig covered by fog and burrowed beneath the trees, to her luck two veteran free people were speaking of her prey at that very moment. Rastorn leant over to Farriel with merriment painted across his face “I thought Merlinros would be here celebrating his promotion”, Rastorn slurred, the elf was clearly drunk.
    “He is down in Hoarhallow messing about with that hobbit Woman”, Farriel replied “He always goes down there when he has had too much to drink. He thinks we don’t know about her but, every hobbit in Hoarhallow knows about it. Marigold can’t keep quiet about her exploits with the famous rune-keeper”. With that Funnelweb sprayed a quick web over the two and tore off towards Hoarhallow she faintly heard Rastorn through the night air “Aahh what was that”.

    It was not hard for Funnelweb to locate this Marigold’s house in Hoarhallow. It was the one on the edge of town with the horrible noises coming out of it. Funnel decided not to think of what foul events were going on within the doors and burrowed waiting for her pray. Luckily the commotion didn’t last long. The door to the hovel opened spreading candle light over the cobblestone path Merlin stepped out barely able to stand. “Thank you for a love*hic*ly even Miss Marigold, stay purdy and look after those feet”, he slurred waggling his eyebrows up and down. With that he stumbled off into the woods, mere feet from the burrowed Funnelweb. The rune-keeper bumped into several trees before he lent himself up against one, hand extended in an attempt to relieve himself over the ground. He only made it as far as his rune-satchel, Funnelweb pounced ready to claim the easy kill.

    Gabascus watched from the safety of a distant tree. The spider was moving very quickly and Merlin for most of the fight was staring at the ground while lightning was flailing out from him wildly. This was clearly a battle of epic proportions, and Gabascus knew because he had been in epic battles before. Gabascus thought of moving in quickly to end the fight, it was only a matter of time before Funnel would need his help. It was at that moment that Merlin dropped to his knees raising a shaking hand clutching a runestone toward the feeble spider. This was Gab’s chance to be a hero again, he fired and arrow it plunged through the rune-keepers chest, finishing the fight and saving the scared spider. He strutted over loud, proud and ready to claim his trophy.

    Funnelweb stood stunned. This drunk rune-keeper hadn’t even landed a single blow to the spider. He was absolutely drenched in venom, but there sticking from his chest was the tell-tale killing blow a giant arrow. Funnel looked up with ferocity in all of her eyes as the large uruk Gabascus lent down cut-away an ear from the rune-keeper and simply said “You’re welcome”.
    i Approv of this message xD except you spelled my name wrong xD but its ok.
    [charsig=http://lotrosigs.level3.turbine.com/0c2140100000b5d67/signature.png]Gabuscus[/charsig] - Gabuscus

  18. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by Hoges View Post
    he was trying to romance his reflection. Itty had long been in love with the orc in the water no one else knew his secret.
    You said you'd never tell.
    [center][color=red][size=3][color=gold]~[/color]Ittybitty, Reaver[color=gold]~[/color][/size]
    [size=1]Sexylegs, Rank [color=cyan]8[/color] Spider[/size]
    [size=1]Vic, Rank [color=cyan]7[/color] Defiler[/size][/color][/center]

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    367

    Much Ado About Something

    Merl,
    I laughed myself silly. Your stories are great. Thanks for the remembrance. Its good to know that some of my stories were well received. Great job. Keep it up.

  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by stravos View Post
    Merl,
    I laughed myself silly. Your stories are great. Thanks for the remembrance. Its good to know that some of my stories were well received. Great job. Keep it up.
    Means a lot Adder, thanks mate glad you enjoyed it. I've been sent so many tells and had so many comments in game been very reassuring to keep writing. Tried writing a dream sequence in my latest story but omg I cannot write in present tense so I just scrapped that idea lol.

    Getting a bit better each time I write and getting more confident in my writing, finding that patience is definately the key. Nearly everyone that has heard about the posts asks "Oh like blackadder" lol. I think your stories were recieved better than you give yourself credit for. They were always a welcome treat and helped to bring our fiesty little server closer together.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  21. #21
    Enter The Burzan
    The blue-jay floated on a gentle breeze hanging motionless in the air. Glorious morning sunshine warmed the bird’s deep blue wings. Below the little hobbit village of Hoarhallow bustled with activity. Children skipped and danced with each other to the tune of the morning bird calls. Mayor Mudbottom stood on his stoop greeting the passers-by with a smile and a nod. The farmers and gardeners mornings were well underway by this time of day. The fields had been sown and now it was time to tend to the village shrubbery. The bird watched on from above as the children started migrating to a particularly famous hobbit. Bobby Underhill was a legend around these parts. He was the first and only Hoarhallowian that had grown up to be a famous adventurer throughout the Ettenmoors, Today the witty minstrel was treating the children to a song and a story of his adventures. The little faces gathered all around him sitting on the cobble-stoned paths as he sat on a food crate ready to begin his story. Even the blue-jay descended down, landing upon a nearby bush to be closer to Bobby’s whimsical voice. “Once upon a time”, Bobby began as the children drew closer smiles spread across their faces “there was a beautif” *THUNK* a giant cleaver and a mottled axe swung through the air, separating Bobby’s head from his shoulders. The blue-jay beat its wings in a startled frenzy trying to escape as unseen warg jaws snapped shut on it, blue feathers puffing into the air. Children screamed and ran for cover as thick rumbling orc laughter reverberated through the small village.

    Burzan laughed as children cried for their Mother’s scattering in every direction. Normally this would be a delight for Burzan, a feast to enjoy for hours, today however had a purpose. Burzan was in need of weaponry. His last fight he’d resorted to beating Whizzy to death with a large spoon after his two favourite swords shattered mid-fight. Burzan ached for free peoples’ steel, their weapons were strong and lasted many battles. He knew if he could lay his hands on a real weapon no one would be able to best him. Raiding Hoarhallow was probably desperate, he had little belief that melting down the hobbit’s cook-pots and utensils would bring about a strong weapon, but at least it was fun.

    Burzan grunted at the white warg before him “Enough snacking on bird Darkwolf, we have work to do. Take the two recruits with you”. Darkwolfshadow leapt out of the perfectly trimmed hedgerow heading to the small hovel homes of the hobbits. With ease he leapt through the round small windows, horrible screams sounded from within before the front door was opened. The fresh faced reaver and knock-kneed warg recruit moved in at Darkwolf’s command to retrieve any implement that may contain steel. The spindly warg was saddled with a mouldy leather harness torn away from an old free-people war horse, it still had horse hair and blood covering odd parts of it. Darkwolf burst out of a second, third and fourth home his white paws now stained red, he motioned for the scrawny warg to stand near the cobbled well in the centre of town so he could be laden with the resources salvaged from today. The tiny green reaver was slowly moving from house to house, his near toothless grin starting to become enthralled with bloodlust as he came upon each new massacre Darkwolf had left behind. Arms full of cooking utensils the recruit moved to the pack-warg and started fastening cook-pots, ladles and knives to the weak-kneed beast.

    The mighty orc watched on, hope brewing in his muscular stomach. He would finally have a weapon worthy of his ability. He was chewing on a hobbit foot when the first rune dissolved over his head, then a second, Burzan leapt into action “TO ME MAGGOTS”, he roared to his crewmen. Burzan charged turning his head to find Merlin and Leoscibe lightning already formed in their hands. They unleashed a powerful onslaught. Burzan knew he couldn’t beat the two of them together but he could weaken them enough so the others could finish them. Fighting through a tirade of lightning, ice and fire Burzan struck at Merlinros and was rewarded with a deep gash to the rune-keepers arm. He swung wildly driving his mighty cleaver deep into Leoscribe’s knee nearly lodging in it. Burzan fell to his knees, the rune-keeper’s ferocity getting the better of him, as he fell hoping to see his three companions moving in for the kill he was sadly disappointed. The two green recruits were caught in thigh deep tar as Darkwolf was doing battle with Rizoel the lore-master. The three experienced free-people quickly converged on the remaining creeps and utterly destroyed them.

    The High-Chieftain came to in the Lugazag resurrection circle, the two green recruits popped up next to him looking bewildered while Darkwolf was growling his annoyance permeating the air. Burzan turned to his companions “Follow my lead, we destroy the rune-keepers then the lore-master dies”. Darkwolf nodded in agreement and the two confused youngsters fell into line. They crossed the wide Hoarhallow river, heading back to the small forest at the northern edge of the Hobbit village. Burzan caught sight of Leoscribe first, he broke into a mad charge froth and spittle flying from his mouth as he screamed “DIE”.
    His call was answered by that of Merlin’s, as the rune-keeper flanked the small group from a nearby tree “Burzan first, then the greenies”. The battle ensued, lightning streaking through the sky to blast Burzan, thick tar hit the ground but Burzan ran straight through it barely slowing, the greenies weren’t quite as quick and were noticeably hampered. Burzan slashed and Darkwolf snapped down on Leoscribe. Burzan was visibly slowing but he managed to land a blow to the rune-keeper’s neck felling his foe. Burzan screamed a new command torment etched in his voice “MERLIN DIE”. The mighty orc turned to face Merlin, he was confronted by both rune-keepers, Leoscribe standing beside Merlin visibly dazed but ready for battle nonetheless. Both rune-keepers through their hand in the air summoning an almighty storm of lightning, they both through their hands forward as two torrents of force cracked through the air and blasted Burzan from his feet. Rizoel brought down a lightning storm of his own on the two greenies that were still struggling with tarred feet, all that was left of them was blackened soot. Darkwolf bit into a solvent of release, avoiding the free-peoples attempts to confine him, and darted off to regroup with his fellows. Burzan lay panting, the three-pronged attack was taking it out of him. Merlinros stood over the fallen Burzan and spoke quietly and confidently “Every time guys, drop Burzan first, he is too dangerous to be left alive” with that a flash of light extended from his hand. Burzan found himself in the resurrection circle one more time.

    Again Burzan reformed his group, they crossed the wide river and fell Merlin at the beginning of the fight only to see him revive next to Leoscribe. Winter and ice whipped the air mixed with lore-master fire, the whole area was alive with force, Burzan’s three companions fell to the force in a matter of moments. Burzan fought on delivering blow after blow to the trio, he ducked behind trees to avoid attacks sprang back to slash at legs, arms and chests. The orc fought like he was possessed by Sauron himself. His cleaver shattered as he deflected a chunk of ice. His axe broke as he lodged it in Leoscribe’s shoulder. Burzan dove to the side once more scrambling into the hobbit town to avoid streaking lightning. He ran to the bundle of cooking utensils searching for a large butcher’s knife or anything sharp. As the trio of free-people enclosed on him, his hand grasped around a steel handle, he turned in ferocity bringing down the weapon on Rizoel’s head. The ladle produced a satisfying thud as it found flesh but it bent on the impact “Ouch” Rizoel responded to the attack, as the three attacked again.

    Burzan roared in fury as he awoke in the resurrection circle. “Useless weapons”, He screamed, he tore two rusted swords from his reaver companion and beheaded him with them. Darkwolfshadow padded up with the spider Roglas and a young war-leader in tow. Burzan nodded his appreciation toward the new bodies “We need vengeance, this is our plan”. Burzan outlined his plan as the party all took their places.

    “Well we got lucky that time”, Merlin commented to his fellow elves “Imagine if Burzan had Norfi’s axe, oh boy that would be rough”. The two answered him with sighs full of relief. “C’mon guys, Burzan won’t come over here again .Lets swim across the river and hope we get another fight”. The trio made their way through the cold river, it was refreshing after the mornings battles. As they pulled themselves onto the bank across the river they noticed Burzan, abandoned, well it was time to strike “Burzan first”, Merlin called. As the three moved in a protective black bubble fell over the reaver, a spider burst from underneath their feet paralysing Merlin and the two wargs pounced Leoscribe finishing him at the back of the fight. The protected Burzan quickly moved in and finished off Merlin, both blades snapping in two as he drove them through the rune-keeper’s chest. Rizoel fell shortly after as the five creeps converged on him.

    Burzan turned away from the fallen enemies feeling little enjoyment from the trouncing they just gave. He stared at the brittle sword hilts in his hands and spoke malice in his voice “I will get a real weapon, and the Ettenmoors will tremble”.
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

  22. #22
    you need 1 about me now merli.. I feel really left out D:
    .
    R8 RK, R8 champ, R7 burg, R8 warden. R13 warg, R10 spider, R9 reaver, R8 Warleader R6 BA

  23. #23
    His next story is gonna be an erotica
    Your misconceptions and fantasies along with your misguided sense of entitlement don't dictate my actions.

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hoges View Post
    Enter The Burzan
    The blue-jay floated on a gentle breeze hanging motionless in the air. Glorious morning sunshine warmed the bird’s deep blue wings. Below the little hobbit village of Hoarhallow bustled with activity. Children skipped and danced with each other to the tune of the morning bird calls. Mayor Mudbottom stood on his stoop greeting the passers-by with a smile and a nod. The farmers and gardeners mornings were well underway by this time of day. The fields had been sown and now it was time to tend to the village shrubbery. The bird watched on from above as the children started migrating to a particularly famous hobbit. Bobby Underhill was a legend around these parts. He was the first and only Hoarhallowian that had grown up to be a famous adventurer throughout the Ettenmoors, Today the witty minstrel was treating the children to a song and a story of his adventures. The little faces gathered all around him sitting on the cobble-stoned paths as he sat on a food crate ready to begin his story. Even the blue-jay descended down, landing upon a nearby bush to be closer to Bobby’s whimsical voice. “Once upon a time”, Bobby began as the children drew closer smiles spread across their faces “there was a beautif” *THUNK* a giant cleaver and a mottled axe swung through the air, separating Bobby’s head from his shoulders. The blue-jay beat its wings in a startled frenzy trying to escape as unseen warg jaws snapped shut on it, blue feathers puffing into the air. Children screamed and ran for cover as thick rumbling orc laughter reverberated through the small village.

    Burzan laughed as children cried for their Mother’s scattering in every direction. Normally this would be a delight for Burzan, a feast to enjoy for hours, today however had a purpose. Burzan was in need of weaponry. His last fight he’d resorted to beating Whizzy to death with a large spoon after his two favourite swords shattered mid-fight. Burzan ached for free peoples’ steel, their weapons were strong and lasted many battles. He knew if he could lay his hands on a real weapon no one would be able to best him. Raiding Hoarhallow was probably desperate, he had little belief that melting down the hobbit’s cook-pots and utensils would bring about a strong weapon, but at least it was fun.

    Burzan grunted at the white warg before him “Enough snacking on bird Darkwolf, we have work to do. Take the two recruits with you”. Darkwolfshadow leapt out of the perfectly trimmed hedgerow heading to the small hovel homes of the hobbits. With ease he leapt through the round small windows, horrible screams sounded from within before the front door was opened. The fresh faced reaver and knock-kneed warg recruit moved in at Darkwolf’s command to retrieve any implement that may contain steel. The spindly warg was saddled with a mouldy leather harness torn away from an old free-people war horse, it still had horse hair and blood covering odd parts of it. Darkwolf burst out of a second, third and fourth home his white paws now stained red, he motioned for the scrawny warg to stand near the cobbled well in the centre of town so he could be laden with the resources salvaged from today. The tiny green reaver was slowly moving from house to house, his near toothless grin starting to become enthralled with bloodlust as he came upon each new massacre Darkwolf had left behind. Arms full of cooking utensils the recruit moved to the pack-warg and started fastening cook-pots, ladles and knives to the weak-kneed beast.

    The mighty orc watched on, hope brewing in his muscular stomach. He would finally have a weapon worthy of his ability. He was chewing on a hobbit foot when the first rune dissolved over his head, then a second, Burzan leapt into action “TO ME MAGGOTS”, he roared to his crewmen. Burzan charged turning his head to find Merlin and Leoscibe lightning already formed in their hands. They unleashed a powerful onslaught. Burzan knew he couldn’t beat the two of them together but he could weaken them enough so the others could finish them. Fighting through a tirade of lightning, ice and fire Burzan struck at Merlinros and was rewarded with a deep gash to the rune-keepers arm. He swung wildly driving his mighty cleaver deep into Leoscribe’s knee nearly lodging in it. Burzan fell to his knees, the rune-keeper’s ferocity getting the better of him, as he fell hoping to see his three companions moving in for the kill he was sadly disappointed. The two green recruits were caught in thigh deep tar as Darkwolf was doing battle with Rizoel the lore-master. The three experienced free-people quickly converged on the remaining creeps and utterly destroyed them.

    The High-Chieftain came to in the Lugazag resurrection circle, the two green recruits popped up next to him looking bewildered while Darkwolf was growling his annoyance permeating the air. Burzan turned to his companions “Follow my lead, we destroy the rune-keepers then the lore-master dies”. Darkwolf nodded in agreement and the two confused youngsters fell into line. They crossed the wide Hoarhallow river, heading back to the small forest at the northern edge of the Hobbit village. Burzan caught sight of Leoscribe first, he broke into a mad charge froth and spittle flying from his mouth as he screamed “DIE”.
    His call was answered by that of Merlin’s, as the rune-keeper flanked the small group from a nearby tree “Burzan first, then the greenies”. The battle ensued, lightning streaking through the sky to blast Burzan, thick tar hit the ground but Burzan ran straight through it barely slowing, the greenies weren’t quite as quick and were noticeably hampered. Burzan slashed and Darkwolf snapped down on Leoscribe. Burzan was visibly slowing but he managed to land a blow to the rune-keeper’s neck felling his foe. Burzan screamed a new command torment etched in his voice “MERLIN DIE”. The mighty orc turned to face Merlin, he was confronted by both rune-keepers, Leoscribe standing beside Merlin visibly dazed but ready for battle nonetheless. Both rune-keepers through their hand in the air summoning an almighty storm of lightning, they both through their hands forward as two torrents of force cracked through the air and blasted Burzan from his feet. Rizoel brought down a lightning storm of his own on the two greenies that were still struggling with tarred feet, all that was left of them was blackened soot. Darkwolf bit into a solvent of release, avoiding the free-peoples attempts to confine him, and darted off to regroup with his fellows. Burzan lay panting, the three-pronged attack was taking it out of him. Merlinros stood over the fallen Burzan and spoke quietly and confidently “Every time guys, drop Burzan first, he is too dangerous to be left alive” with that a flash of light extended from his hand. Burzan found himself in the resurrection circle one more time.

    Again Burzan reformed his group, they crossed the wide river and fell Merlin at the beginning of the fight only to see him revive next to Leoscribe. Winter and ice whipped the air mixed with lore-master fire, the whole area was alive with force, Burzan’s three companions fell to the force in a matter of moments. Burzan fought on delivering blow after blow to the trio, he ducked behind trees to avoid attacks sprang back to slash at legs, arms and chests. The orc fought like he was possessed by Sauron himself. His cleaver shattered as he deflected a chunk of ice. His axe broke as he lodged it in Leoscribe’s shoulder. Burzan dove to the side once more scrambling into the hobbit town to avoid streaking lightning. He ran to the bundle of cooking utensils searching for a large butcher’s knife or anything sharp. As the trio of free-people enclosed on him, his hand grasped around a steel handle, he turned in ferocity bringing down the weapon on Rizoel’s head. The ladle produced a satisfying thud as it found flesh but it bent on the impact “Ouch” Rizoel responded to the attack, as the three attacked again.

    Burzan roared in fury as he awoke in the resurrection circle. “Useless weapons”, He screamed, he tore two rusted swords from his reaver companion and beheaded him with them. Darkwolfshadow padded up with the spider Roglas and a young war-leader in tow. Burzan nodded his appreciation toward the new bodies “We need vengeance, this is our plan”. Burzan outlined his plan as the party all took their places.

    “Well we got lucky that time”, Merlin commented to his fellow elves “Imagine if Burzan had Norfi’s axe, oh boy that would be rough”. The two answered him with sighs full of relief. “C’mon guys, Burzan won’t come over here again .Lets swim across the river and hope we get another fight”. The trio made their way through the cold river, it was refreshing after the mornings battles. As they pulled themselves onto the bank across the river they noticed Burzan, abandoned, well it was time to strike “Burzan first”, Merlin called. As the three moved in a protective black bubble fell over the reaver, a spider burst from underneath their feet paralysing Merlin and the two wargs pounced Leoscribe finishing him at the back of the fight. The protected Burzan quickly moved in and finished off Merlin, both blades snapping in two as he drove them through the rune-keeper’s chest. Rizoel fell shortly after as the five creeps converged on him.

    Burzan turned away from the fallen enemies feeling little enjoyment from the trouncing they just gave. He stared at the brittle sword hilts in his hands and spoke malice in his voice “I will get a real weapon, and the Ettenmoors will tremble”.
    I approve of this message.carry on.
    [URL=http://s1201.photobucket.com/user/GoDFa7h3r/media/rsz_screenshot000201_zps322d3f9a.jpg.html][IMG]http://i1201.photobucket.com/albums/bb347/GoDFa7h3r/rsz_screenshot000201_zps322d3f9a.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
    Burzan aka Trompok(BW) - R14 Reaver
    Looks like meat's back on the menu boys!

  25. #25
    Well I am glad everyone is approving of my stories lol. Enjoying writing them at the moment. I've finished the introduction of the MeM focused story. Definately going to be a light hearted one and I am taking many liberties with this one, making up backrounds, conversations and well the entire thing to create the story lol. Going to be a very light hearted read and hoping that its quite funny.

    After that I will be working on a four parter, which I will attempt to write more dramatic, but well......we will just wait and see.

    And most importantly, where are everyone elses stories. That was the whole point of start the thread! So I could read other peoples stories! Get cracking Moorsers!
    Merlinros - Brandywine
    [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1pDdg8Ha0A[/url]

 

 
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